Tuesday, 24 January 2012

Happy Birthday Mum!!!

Today is Mum's birthday and since she won't get her card in time (as it's still in my handbag, oops!) I decided I would use my blog to make it up to her ;)

I've always been very lucky that I can tell my Mum anything.  I seem to remember her being the stricter parent until I was about 17, when she suddenly seemed much more relaxed.  Although I've always felt like we were friends, it wasn't until I was older that I really appreciated her as one.  I suspect it's the same for most girls who just don't like being told what to do and it's only when they let you go off and make your stupid mistakes that you start to realise that these Mums are actually pretty wise and useful to talk to!

When I was 18, my Dad moved abroad for work and I moved out of home in my 2nd year at university.  I would say moved out for the first time, but it was the only time since (unlike all of my uni friends) I actually properly moved out.  I didn't go home for the holidays, I didn't go back to get washing done, I didn't have my own room there any more.  After two years (when my brother started university), there was no 'home' - it was rented out and Mum went to join Dad in Saudi Arabia.  My new flat was my home.  And I loved it!

It was during these two years after Dad left but before Mum went to join him that I grew even closer to her. We would chat most evenings on the phone - something I suspect we wouldn't have done as much of, had we been living in the same house (chatting obviously as the phone thing would just be silly!)  I specifically remember one year when I used to watch Big Brother (the year Jade Goody was in it) and after each episode, she would ring and we'd share our opinions and laugh about the shenanigans!  We would spend time together when she would come over the river (I was still only 30 minutes away from our village, in the big city) to go shopping in town or to visit when she needed to go to the supermarket but I never felt like she was trying to keep an eye on me, just that she wanted to spend some time with me.  We had great fun.

"That" knowing look

One particular thing I remember was when, for my parent's 25th wedding anniversary, Dad wasn't able to be home so he arranged with me to take Mum out in a Limousine (I forget whose idea that was) and he paid for it.  So off we went for an hour being driven around the city, just me and Mum and a bottle of Champagne in the back of this huge white Limo!  I had it drop us at the student's union and we continued to spend the rest of the night dancing away!  I just loved that I could take my Mum to the union, meet up with some friends and have a great night!  She was dragging me up to dance towards the end!

Me & "The Mums" in a club on my hen night - my MIL is pretty cool & stylish too!

She has an amazing sense of humour, she's stylish, she is a great listener (not that she has much choice most of the time!) and is fantastic at making all kinds of things, especially crafts.  I still remember the matching outfits she used to sew for us when I was little!  The rainbow check skirt being one that sticks out in my mind - I loved it!!

Out shopping with our Desigual (a favourite shop of ours) garments on!

Not quite so stylish in our Abayas (but still shopping)!

Nowadays I only get to see her once a year (sometimes twice if I'm getting married for example!) but we still have so much fun!  If I am visiting her, or we meet up somewhere else, we often go diving as a family.  We ALWAYS find time to shop wherever we are.  We have great chats about anything and everything and I really value that.  I know that she understands me, sometimes even when I don't understand myself, and she is really good at advice.  I know she gets frustrated with me sometimes (mostly when I try to do too much) but she still tries to help and somehow always remains calm, at least relative to me!  She reminds me of my husband in that respect - she is not a worrier like I am and she too is a calming influence on me.

Last year she really made a huge difference to me.  The year I got married.  I couldn't have done it without her.  By that I mean not just the organisation, support and crafting involved in creating our wedding day, but actually being the person that I am, which enabled me to meet Nik in the first place and also to realise that he was the perfect man for me (not perfect, absolutely not, but for me, yes) and to want a marriage and to have a marriage to aspire to.  They are now at 35 years!!

Mum looking proudly on (with Dad and David (brother))

I can't remember what she said but I'm sure it was wise or funny, maybe both!

We don't talk as often these days and I know Nik doesn't understand that sometimes we go weeks without a phone call or email.  Usually when nothing much has happened.  But sometimes we have phases of speaking almost every day - usually when nothing much has happened!  (Thank goodness for Martin Lewis and the 1.5p a minute deal on the CallChecker!)  That's one of the great things about having your mother as a friend.  She doesn't get upset if you don't ring for a while.  She doesn't care if you don't have much to say when you do ring.  She gets it when you phone just because you are ill even though she can't do anything about it (especially from thousands of miles away) and even when you sometimes can't actually talk.  She doesn't care if you are a bit mental and tell her all kinds of crazy exciting things, or just phone to cry at her about something ridiculous.  She DOES get a little mad if you forget her birthday though.  (I did that once and it was awful!)

So, thank you Mum for being my Mum.  I am very lucky to also have you as my friend.

Love you!

Your card will be posted today and you will receive it sometime in February probably (hopefully!)  I haven't forgotten, I just didn't remember in enough time.  


thebabywife said...

Aww - Happy Birthday Mummy Dragonfly! xxx

Lynky said...

Card, what card? Why would I need a card and how could a card ever top that amazing blog?? Thank you so much for making my day, it couldn't get much better - well not unless David blogged as well and that's not going to happen!! lol Thank you my darling daughter, and I'm so glad my being strict didn't alienate you, perhaps one to remember when you have little tots.... I'm sure I won't be as strict with them. Love you lots and miss you always. Mummy and best friend! xxx

Anonymous said...

I'm sure that truly makes up for the belated card,wonderful words.She's not a bad sister either !!

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