Thursday, 21 November 2013


by Bex

So, you all know a lot about my health when it comes to the IVF.  What you don't know is that this year I have also been suffering from what I thought was IBS, related to the stress (don't worry I won't be going into detail!).  I'd basically just been ignoring it, I had enough to worry about already and it was annoying but manageable.  Recently though it has become less so and more than annoying so, finally listening to my husband's pestering, I went to see my GP.  She's referred me to a clinic to get checked out as we now suspect it might actually be IBD rather than IBS.  Oh Joy.

Anyway, the reason I am writing about this, is that while I was there, she asked if I'd lost any weight and if I knew how much I weighed.  I knew I had put on weight rather than lost it (I wish I was one of those people who weight just drops off during times of stress) but I had no idea what I weighed so she got me to hop on the scales.

Oh. Dear.

You may have seen from my instagrams/tweets of and about food that over the last year, I have basically been using food as a comfort and a distraction.  Rebecca even commented on how calorific my diet appeared to be.  I didn't care.  I was just trying to stay happy, even though I know that exercise is really the best way to do that, I just couldn't muster the energy to go swimming after work.  Or to make a healthy meal.  With Nik's exams and shifts, we've rarely had evenings at home together over the last few months so I have basically been coming home, eating whatever can be cooked/microwaved quickly and easily, munching on sweets and writing, reading, crafting and/or watching TV.

So now that I have got all my excuses in ;) can you guess how much I weighed?

14 stone!  Oh My God!  Since my weight loss last year, when I lost 16 lbs and got down to a comfortable weight where I was very happy with how I felt and how I looked - 12st 2lbs, the lowest I was at (aiming for 12st), I have put on nearly 2 stone!  I don't think I've ever been this heavy before and it's certainly not going to help with the IVF if we ever do manage to get an embryo transfer!

It's the kick I needed.  Despite having done little exercise since finding out about our fertility problems, I know I need to be as healthy as possible.  It's just been very difficult while feeling so down, to get up and do something about it.  This evening, I wrote out a shopping list of all the healthy snacks I remembered eating last year, that diet really worked for me (my own diet - basically just my idea of eating better) so I will be using my own posts for inspiration.  I also went swimming after work despite finishing at 7, in the dark, wet, windy evening and being uber hungry.  I drove straight to the pool without coming home to get tempted by the cosy flat and thoughts of snuggling up on the sofa.  I only stayed for around 25 mins (I think, the clock I used to time myself had stopped but I didn't realise until length 7!) and did 20 lengths but it's a start.  I came home and made a stir fry full of chicken and vegetables and a very few noodles.  It was lovely.  I just need to stop being lazy, I do actually enjoy healthy food and it will probably help with my symptoms as well ( which have been possibly adding to the reason there have been fewer outfit posts of late - bloating and generally feeling and looking a bit rubbish means I haven't felt like making as much of an effort style-wise).

Stir-fry recipe (serves 3 or 4) - a randomly thrown together mix of sunflower oil, soy sauce, dash of fish sauce, sesame seeds, linseeds, 1 cube of frozen chilli, 2 cubes of frozen ginger and 1 clove garlic, 1/2 onion, 3 chicken breasts, 1/2 a broccoli, 4 large mushrooms, 1 yellow pepper, 1 pack of mange tout & baby corn, 1/2 pack of curly kale, 1/2 pack of straight to wok noodles (1 of the inner sachets), black pepper.  Delish.

I think to keep myself going I need to keep a diary as I did last time (even though it was hard to keep up!) with weekly weigh ins.  It won't be easy, especially with Christmas and all it's related goodies coming up!  I wasn't too strict last time, I just need to stop going overboard with naughty stuff ALL the time.  Knowing I have committed to sharing my progress on here will motivate me when I just want to come home without that swim or sneak in a massive vat of macaroni cheese. Please feel free to ignore them if they bore you.  I just need to do it for me.


Vonnie said...

I joke a lot about my weight and make out that I don't care, but I'm also around 14 stone and I'm becoming more and more frustrated that I can't get the clothes I want or like in my size. I'll be your diet bore buddy if you like.

Have you tried the MyFitnessPal app? It worked really well for me x

Unknown said...

I'm definitely an 'emotional' eater, so can empathise with all that you've said about food being an emotional distraction and a comfort.

I've lost a stone and a half since May, and like Vonnie I can recommend MFP. I like the routine of logging everything that I eat (that said, I,m on holiday at the moment and not logging at all!) and having the encouragement and success stories of others spurs me on. I've had a couple of blips, but generally I'm on the right trajectory- though I know it will be harder with Christmas round the corner! (But will be starting a new job in December involving a 45 minute walk each way, so I'm hoping evens out, at least leading up to the holidays!)
Good luck, you always do yummy meals and I'm off to spy on your health food Pinterest board for inspiration for our post holiday detox!

Unknown said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Bex said...

Well done Susan, that's great! Thanks for the support both of you. I have tried MFP and liked it but found it took so long to log recipes adding individual ingredients. I only used it for a week! I should try it again - things with barcodes are great and it did surprise me how quickly the calories can add up even with healthy things. I'd never counted calories in my life before and it did spur me on to do more exercise.

I would like to walk to work again but hate walking alone in the dark evenings after a recent mugging right outside the surgery - it's not the nicest area!

Kirsty | A Safe Mooring said...

Bex, you are my hero for posting this. I would never have known this when I saw you the other week - you looked great! You're completely right to focus on feeling healthy and getting to a weight that feels right for you. Taking care of your body is the best present you can give yourself. (If only I would take my own advice, I've been terrible lately too, and definitely consuming plenty of extra comfort calories.) We'll all be cheering you on!

Unknown said...

Oh good luck Bex! I have been trying to keep a track of my weight due to comfort consumption too and am never someone who weight falls off when stressed. I agree that focusing on what feels healthy and right for you is the way forward and I really hope it works for you xx

Gwen - TheFoodieHistorian said...

Bex I’m really sorry to hear about the IBS/IBD, how horrible. I have so, so much admiration for your honesty though – so much! And I agree with the others - whatever works for you is the right way forward.
I am another comfort eater. I lost 3 stone a couple of years ago and have kept most of it off but it is so easy to slip when I am fed up or stressed. I exercise pretty much every day, mostly so that I can have treats but also because I feel so much better for it, both mentally and physically. Although forcing myself to walk home from work in the winter is hard! I have realised though that eating badly makes me feel worse –sluggish and miserable – and that high fat foods and lots of meat really aggravate my stomach, so fingers crossed that your symptoms will reduce.
I’m another myfitnesspal fan – feel free to add me if you give it another go.

Fee said...

I keep trying to comment but it keeps deleting, fingers crossed this will work.

I think you always look great but it's how you feel that matters so good for you - I will be cheering you on!


Amanda M said...

You look great but it's how you feel that counts. I struggle badly with my weight so will be very interested to hear how you get on and pick up any tips.

Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...


TOTS100 - UK Parent Blogs